Lessons From My Exes

This one will probably be most difficult to write about, so bear with me. I feel like we have a lot of expectations when it comes to relationships, love, and how we feel like it should look and feel. All of these expectations were thrown out the window for me after my last realish relationship (link to that blog: https://lessonsfrommyexes.blogspot.com/2019/03/lessons-from-boy-with-accent.html ). So I stopped looking. I was about to start going to a new school in a new place so I had the mindset that I was just going to do me, until I was there for about two days and it hit me right in my face. It was just another day after a day of practice, and I was sitting with my team eating dinner. All of a sudden I look up and see probably the most beautiful human being on the planet. Y'ALL. I didn’t believe in love at first sight until I saw this man. I was just in awe. I felt this weird pull that I just had to know him. I had to love him. It was the weirdest thing I have ever fe...

Yep. I fell in love with my best friend. *FAT EYE ROLL* Here's the story. In high school, I can’t lie - social pressures got the best of me. I took on many different personas and had the imagination of a little kid. There was only one point when I felt like my true self, and that was in the company of my best group of friends. This group of friends consisted of 3 boys and 1 other girl. Sure, the ratio was off, but this friend group wasn’t like that. These were some of the truest friends I would ever know and loving them was so easy, but there was one friend in particular that I felt beyond connected to. He was so special to me and still is. He was like a big brother, dad, role model and I don’t know how I landed a friend like him. In retrospect, I had the FATTEST crush on this kid coming into high school, so becoming his friend was just so confusing.  I could do some of the dumbest things on this planet and he would be right there to tell me how stupid it was, but he’d ne...

Well alright… another day, another blog about ANOTHER boy! Obviously if you have read my previous blog posts, I have been thrown into a lot situations when it comes to relationships and have learned a lot of different things. This one was no different. When I was on the up and outs with the homie from my last post, I met this guy. Mind you, this is when I lived in Iowa. Iowa was SO. SMALL. And my campus was even smaller (if that’s even possible). I lived on a campus that only housed soccer players, so I was living, eating with, and constantly breathing the same air as the same 40 people for two years. It doesn’t sound that bad until you’re in it, and it really wasn’t that bad after I met him. It was so stupid how it all started. Someone broke my laptop charger and of course I have the weirdest laptop on the whole entire planet, so no one had the same charger as me. When I was asking around, they all told me that they thought this boy had the same model laptop as me. Desperate...

I knew there was something weird about today, but I couldn’t quite put my finger on it. There was nothing out of the ordinary that happened. I had to wake up DUMB early for work, do some origami (don’t ask), walked around the little shopping center, took my pup to get his first professional grooming, and took a nap. Oh! I also found $20, so that was cool. Almost cool enough to make a sunny and warm day a whole lot better, but it didn’t. All day I found myself craving to get these words out about a boy that I never thought would still be on my mind to this day. This relationship thing was the first thing I got into after I went through a really hard time with my breakup from the guy I wrote my last blog about. It was the most unexpected thing ever. We had known each other throughout the entirety of my high school career, but it was this one night that changed everything. It was a Halloween party and mannnnn did I look cute! But anyway, I was in a pretty bad situation on this particu...

I am feeling a lot of love in my heart tonight and I feel like this is the best time to talk about the relationship that motivated me and taught me the best things about life and got me to step out of my comfort zone in the best way possible. I wish I could disclose his name because the amount of gratitude that I have in my heart for him is unmatched because of the way he treated me and the things he taught me. I want to start by reminiscing about the early times of our relationship. We were quite an odd couple in the eyes of basically everyone, as we ran in two completely different circles and we honestly probably wouldn’t have met each other if it wasn’t for the fact that I was hiding from a creepy guy at the fair! I don’t know what it was about him that made my heart smile and made me appreciate every aspect of life all day, every day. He made me the best version of myself. It was sooooo out of my social norm to date someone like him. I was 16, so I was at an extremely stubb...

In the wake of all the drama happening between Jordyn Woods and the KarJenners (if you don’t know about it, don’t worry. Gwyneth Paltrow doesn’t know either), I wanted to use this blog post to discuss betrayal. I have learned a lot about betrayal over the past couple of years. There is nothing in this world that hurts more than being left by someone you thought would never leave your life. In 2009, I my best friend lost her life. Now in no way, shape, or form do I look at her leaving this planet as betrayal. I look at this traumatic event in my life as a blessing. She was one of the greatest pieces of art to ever walk this planet. No matter what she did, I looked at her like she was the sun because she was. Ever since then, I have learned to keep this same energy for the people that come into my life. I have a flaw of giving people the benefit of the doubt whenever I meet them. This is always the first thought that comes into my head due to the fact that I feel like I can’t r...

Boy, oh boy…. This one is an interesting one to even think about because it's been so long. Let’s talk about my first boyfriend. To make a long story, short about how we met and fell in looOOooOve… this is all you need to know. I met this boy whilst in my freshman biology class in high school. He was that funny kid that made fun of/flirted/terrorized our teacher. It was enough to make me roll my eyes and become smitten with him all at the same time. We started to hang out before I would have to go to basketball practice and sometimes I would even be late to practice because I wanted to squeeze in a few extra minutes with him. After a couple of times of hanging out, we had our first kiss. Let me tell you….this was THE most disgusting encounter of my life. If you know anything about where I went to high school, we had a set of stairs that we would call “the big stairs.” Sooo a top the big stairs, we were just standing there, and the vibes were all right, like there...